Let Old Hoss show you the way

Follow the legend himself: @OldHossRadbourn

HARLEM — What I’ve noticed quickly about this little blogging expedition is that there’s been a wider range of people on here than I would have expected. This is encouraging. But we’ve also got our fair share of seamheads, which is why this post is dedicated to the Twitter phenomenon @OldHossRadbourn.

If you are already among the 2,605 people who follow Old Hoss’ hilarious brilliance, well bully for you. And since I’ve got your page view already, feel free to skip the rest. But for the unfamiliar, you should know that in the last season, Old Hoss has made himself a must-follow and an established Press Box hit.

Take, for example, the following dispatches:

I remember when “MTV Cribs” once visited. “Hi, MTV, welcome to my crib. Here’s my dirt floor. There’s my horse and buggy. Now get out.”

His take on Groundhog Day:

In my day we shot at the damn groundhog. If you hit him, six more weeks of winter… but also, savory groundhog stew.

And on the Mets:

When D. Strawberry calls your team out, it’s time to pack it in. That’s like cocaine telling you “no thanks, your nose is a dump.”

And finally, here’s something from this morning, when Old Hoss gives us some inside dirt on his playing days. These are my favorites:

In 1884 we on the Grays debated the virtues of 4- and 6-man rotations. Would we start me, me, me, me or me, me, me, me, me, me?

You can look it up. That season, Old Hoss started 73 games and finished all of them, going 59-12 with a 1.38 ERA. My favorite part is that he actually worked in relief and finished two games for somebody else. Could you imagine being that guy? He must have felt like a real douchebag. And if he didn’t, he should have. Anyway, Old Hoss’ total innings count for the season: 678 2/3.

While Old Hoss is indeed in “the ultimate bullpen,” and has been since 1897, it’s good to know that this “pitching deity and dapper gent” is still capable of twirling a gem.

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